It’s delicious, it’s comforting, it’s hot, it’s cold….it’s food, and I have a deep relationship with it. My relationship with food is like the childhood friend that you’ve never dated, but always had a thing for.

No matter what happens in life, food is there to comfort me. I’m a person that enjoys eating, and I live to eat, I don’t eat to live.

 

But my body knows when it’s over consuming because it gets bloated and slower. No one has ever said “I really should’ve eaten a lot more”. The problem with my love for food is that it is an emotional attachment, and when you emotionally attach to anything or anyone, a part of your happiness depends upon that.

Think about why would you give a THING, like food, so much power? It’s quite silly when you think about it… allowing food to control your happiness.

 

I’m guilty of this, I get HANGRY when I miss important meals, and then I want to binge eat all of the things I shouldn’t because I “haven’t eaten all day”. Or when I go through a breakup, I immediately go to the grocery store and buy a pint of Chunky Monkey ice cream. For workout motivation, if I run a certain number of miles during the week, on Friday’s I eat pizza for dinner.

 

I have habits and emotional connections to food. This is what I know needs to stop in order for me to have a healthy relationship with food. I have to explore new ways of celebrating successes and coping with heartache. Here are some things I’ve been thinking of trying:

 

  1. Getting an easy clean up painting kit that I can pull out and set up with my easel. Taking a trip to a local spot that makes me feel inspired, like the beach or a busy cafe where a lot of different personalities come in and out. 
  2. Joining group exercise, like Zumba or Bunda, to get more physical activity associated with fun music, exciting physical challenges, and other people! The bumpin’ music so I can dance in my favorite high waist leggings and the social interactions are my workout motivation.
  3. Suggesting to my family playing a game of softball after Thanksgiving dinner each year
  4. Try getting some steam off at an anger room, like Rage Ground in Los Angeles, Rage Room Philadelphia, Break Bar NYC, or Kanya Lounge in Chicago.
  5. Gift myself new body shaping leggings, like Tribe 35’s matching Tribal Set.
  6. Getting a deep tissue massage or a Thai massage.
  7. A visit to my local Glam Seamless hair salon to get my extensions reinstalled and glammed up.
  8. Planning a summer beach vacation and ordering sexy new pieces from Coco et Dolce.
  9. Paying it forward by getting involved in non-profit organizations whose missions I believe in.
  10. Challenging myself with a self-development goal, like learning how to meditate on my own without an app.

 

My hope is that after dissociating emotional events directly with food, I will have the strength to control my eating habits so that I can improve them. When I don't feel bloated, it's a lot easier for me to talk myself into a workout. I know that my weight fluctuates every few years because I still have not tackled this lifelong challenge.

When I’m happy in a relationship, it’s “celebrated” by eating more. When I lose a friend or family member, it’s grieved with food. I challenge myself to celebrate happy relationships by starting healthy habits with my partner like group fitness, or when I do grieve again, to hit up an anger room to process my feelings. 

I don't aspire to be skinny like Khloe Kardashian, I just want to adopt the same level of physical activity she now does. Girlfriend is killin' it!

What are you going to try this summer from the list?

June 10, 2022 — DENISE HOPKINS